Tour-de-Fat Aug 23rd

On Saturday the Tour-de-Fat strolled through Boise yet again for a fabulous day of fun-filled-folly. If you enjoy bikes, beer, and utter foolishness, you'd love the Tour-de-Fat! This is a bike loving, fun filled beer festival, held by New Belgium Brewing company. It moves around the country to select cities each summer and Boise just happens to be one of those lucky cities. We're very grateful for that too as it's so much fun! Each year the festival is started with a massive bike ride on which everyone is encouraged to dress up in ANY crazy costume they can think of (without getting themselves arrested that is). After this, everyone congretates in a park to drink beer, and listen to good music and to promote the New Belgium lifestyle. Unfortunatley this year, Chad and I missed the mass bike ride (we both had to work), but we each left work early in order to attend the last several hours of the festial. Here's what it looks like...

The stage and some performers down below (between bands playing).

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Here's what Chad looked like. Sweet hair and beer goggles sweetie! I'm a lucky woman!

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Me, and yes that is a beer in my hand. Okay, so it's Chad's beer, but I did sip on it occasionally.

At the center of the festival is a corraled off area where they've designed a bunch of funny bikes for people to ride. Here's Chad testing them out:

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A scooter bike.

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Yes, that is a bike with shoes for wheels. Doesn't everybody have one?

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Chad in background (some unknown guy in foreground) -there were lots of red shirts and pink helmets in the bike corral.

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This was the point where I wondered if it was wise to leave the insurance card at home...

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And finally...

Chad on a true fat-tire bike!

We've easily established that after a few beers, Chad likes riding goofy bikes in pink helmets, sticking his tongue out and flashing devil horns at everyone. In New Belgium style... 'Follow your Folly.' For that afternoon, that's exactly what we did.

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Can't wait until next year!

I hate squirrels!

No joke. In a matter of about three hours one evening the squirrels completely demolished our hammock!!!

I've been carrying that hammock around for over 9 years waiting until we could have a place to use it. I bought it on a trip to Mexico in January of 1999! We finally get finished creating the perfect back yard to use it in, so we splurge and buy a nice hammock stand, and then the squirrels have to go and eat the hammock! I am very much anti squirrel right now...

We're strongly considering teaching Nali a new trick... tree climbing/squirrel hunting/hammock avenging.

From the Heart in memory of Pax (2)

We have some VERY special updates on remembrances in honor of Pax to share with you all.

This past weekend Forest and Millie Wood and Nancy and Larry Patrick planted an absolutely beautiful Lavender Twist Weeping Redbud in the front yard of Nancy and Larry's house. It is planted where everyone will be able to see it immediately whenever they visit the Patrick house. It is an umbrella shaped tree that will produce reddish purple flowers in early spring. What makes this plant even more special is that the leaves are all shaped like hearts! It will be a constant reminder to everyone that visits how much we all loved Pax and how dearly we miss him. We want to thank them all very much for buying such a beautiful tree with so much meaning and symbolism attached to it. We can't wait to see all the little heart shaped leaves multiply as the tree grows throughout the years to come. Thank you so much!

Chad, digging the hole.

Lavender Twist Weeping Redbud

Look at the perfectly heart shaped leaves!

Forest, Millie, Nancy, Larry

Bill and Patty McDonald planted a Siberian Pea for Pax in their yard in Howe, Id. They planted the bush/tree in an area of the yard where we can often be found playing different yard games whenever we visit them. It will be nice to see the plants changes in growth whenever we visit. We were also happy to hear that the plant is a wind and drought tolerant plant which should do well in that area. It will be fun to play games while laughing and visiting with family and friends next to Pax tree in the future. Thank you both!

Bill digging the hole.

Planting the Siberian Pea

It's the little one in the center. Should be fun to watch it grow.

In addition to this plant, Patty had a wonderful story to tell us about a tree in their yard that started on it's own. The very week we lost Pax, Patty said she noticed a tiny little pine tree had started to grow of it's own accord not far from their house. The amazing thing is that there are absolutely no other trees like this one anywhere in the visinity of their property. It's one of those stories that sends a good shiver down your spine... They plan to keep watering the tree, and perhaps next year, when it's a bit bigger, they will transplant it farther from the house. It's an amazing thing...

Here's the little self-starter!

Bill and Patty McDonald also climbed Diamondpeak and wrote Pax name in the book on the top. This sit he second peak (in addition to Mt. Borah) that they have included his name int he book on the summit.

Again, we want to thank them for being so thoughtful.

Howe, Aug 9-12th

Okay, so I've gotten a little behind in my blogging... sorry. Here goes on catching up.

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Chad, Sara, Nali and I recently took a wonderful trip to Howe to visit Bill and Patty who we hadn't seen in way too ridiculously long! It was a much needed trip.

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Our first night there (Sat) was very relaxing. We sat around visiting while we ate dinner on the porch and just talked the night away, telling stories and laughing. It was very nice. The next day (Sun) we went for a hike in a canyon up the valley that, believe it or not, even my dad had never explored (imagine that!) It was such a beautiful day. The weather was warm and sunny, the flowers were blooming like crazy and all kinds of butterflies were out dancing from flower to flower. In addition to this, the berries were ripe!!! We found currant berries along the trail and a humongous patch of wild raspberries up the canyon at the base of an old avalanche field. We (I) definitely ate my share of raspberries especially since they were perfectly ripe. Yumm! We hiked for a couple of hours and dad was tracking animals the entire way. He was able to find some very good bear tracks and followed them for quite some time. Then, on the way back to the truck, Chad found a young moose antler in very good condition which we brought home.

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Chad and Nali on the trail.

In front of an old cabin: Bill, Sara, Nicki, Chad (and dogs)

Some of the berries made Nicki feel funny... See ;-P

Forest code for "Bear was here!"

Here's Patty! Always smiling.

Look, it's Sasquatch in a raspberry patch! Wait... that's just dad.

That night we had a big family dinner at the house. Uncle Chuck and Aunt Joy were there and my cousin Chenoa and her husband Mike came over from Idaho Falls with their gorgeous daughter Rowan. It was so nice to finally meet Rowan (who is even more adorable in person than in pictures) and to catch up with Mike and Chenoa. Bill and Patty also had a few friends of theirs join us. It was a nice evening and great food.

Sara and Rowan. Aren't they adorable!

I can't tell whose smile is bigger.

On Monday, Patty had to work, so the rest of us 'found stuff to do' during the day. We visited the horses at Uncle Chuck's house for a bit. We took Sissy and Red out for some food (aka weed-eating) and combed them for a while. We then visited the old horse Sully and gave him some love and attention.

Sissy and Red with Saddle Mountain in the background.

Chad, Bill, Sara and Sissy

Nicki, Bill, and Sissy

Nicki, Chuck, and Sully

After this Sara, Chad and I took a romp (that's right, I said romp) up towards the mountains and went cactus hunting. We found a few very nice cactus (including a couple barrel cactus) and were able to transplant them nicely in our front yard when we got home. After successfully finding the cactus, we headed back to the house for a few intense games of bocce ball. And I don't care what Bill and Chad tell everyone - Sara and I kicked ass... Okay, okay, okay... the only thing Sara and I kicked ass at was losing! We were having an off day okay. Perhaps it was the wine?... We will seek our revenge next time.

When Patty returned home, we all took some time to plant a beautiful little Siberian Pea Bush in honor of Pax in Bill and Patty's yard. It should do fabulously out there as they are a drought hardy plant. It will be nice to watch it grow over the years.

Nicki, Chad, and Bill planting the Siberian Pea

After the planting, Chad and I started to prepare dinner. Because Bill and patty are always doing so much when we visit, we decided to cook them dinner. We (and of course by this I mean 90% Chad) cooked salmon fillets and halibut kabobs on the grill. It was amazing! On top of that, Chad made his first ever dutch oven Raspberry Cobbler. It was a fantastic desert.

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Chad grilling the kabobs and salmon fillets.

Yummy! Raspberry Cobbler!

Overall we had a fabulous trip visiting them. We can't wait to visit again, though we think it's high time they come to visit us in the big city :-)

Because you should always share something beautiful with others

Lillies are my all-time favorite flowers. Doesn't matter what kind, color, or size of lilly, I love them all!!! So, we made sure to plant some in the backyard to see if they would take. Well, see for yourself. They're just beautiful!

You just have to share something this beautiful with others!

From the heart in memory of Pax

We just wanted to update everyone on the current donations, trees, and other things people have done to date in order to remember Pax. Thank you each from the very bottom of our heart!

And everyone else, remember to keep us updated and send photos when you do or plant something!

Bill and Patty climbed Mt. Borah over a week ago. It sounds like it was a great day. They added Pax' name along with their own to the log book at the top. This meant a lot to us. Thanks!

Mark, Joy, and Aubrey Morris bought us some beautiful plants for our yard to remember Pax by:

Glowing Peace Rose Bush planted in full sun in our backyard and doing very well.

Mezoo Trailing Red plant which we planted in the front yard in front of one of the beautiful pieces of decorative rock we collected last summer.

Pei-Lin Yu and Clint Hughes bought a baby Japanese Maple and planted it. This is one of our favorite trees and was actually the first tree bought and planted.

John McDonald bought a Golden Vicary Privet tree and planted it in a little knoll in a nice clearing just outside Nashville, TN. It is planted right in the middle of the clearing and it looks like a beautiful spot.

Laurel Harding-Smith and Teresa Clark gave us a Nelly Moser Clematis which we bought a beautiful trellis for and planted in the back yard.

Joella Schiepan made a donation to the Little Hearts Foundation.

Aunt Pat McDonald made a donation to the Little Hearts Foundation.

Chenoa and Mike Allen made a donation to Spencer's Fund.

FCAP (Fellowship of Christian Airline Personnel), who found out about our loss from my co-workers, made a donation to the Little Hearts Foundation.

Thank you all so much. We'll post soon hopefully with more updates on the positive things that can come out of something so hard. Thanks again!

A beautifully painted box for Pax

So, Chad and I found a beautifully painted red and yellow box for Pax.

The box is from India and it is called a Shekhawati box. "In 18th Century India, wealthy merchants built beautifully painted Havelis (mansions) in the Rajasthan area of India. Over time, the artisans began painting every day household items. This box is an excellent example of the hand painted style in both the color and the delicate pattern."

We thought the box was absolutley beautiful and that it would be the perfect place for us to place the few memorable items we have of Pax. We would like to invite anyone who would like to add something, like a note or card (or whatever) to the box to please feel free to help us do so. If you want to add a letter, but don't want us to read it, that's fine with us too. We'll leave it sealed in the box. The only thing to keep in mind is that it is not a big box. Only 11 x 8'' on the inside.

Items we are currently keeping in the box:

When we first found out I was pregnant, we started a journal with the intention of writing in it over the years as our child grew up and someday, when they were grown we would give it to them. We've decided that even though Pax is gone we're going to keep this journal in the box and we've both agreed that we will still (and have since) continued to write in it to help with grieving process and to help us remember Pax, and the ever so short time we had him in our lives.

We're also going to store all the wonderful cards, letters, and notes that we have recieved from friends.

We're going to add a couple of the Jones Soda bottles that we used to announce him to the world.

At Nancy's request, we added the "I love my Grandma" bib that she got him after she found out she was going to be a Grandma.

Future additions:

We will get copies of all of Pax' ultrasound photos and add them.

Many people have pledged to plant trees in the near future in Pax honor (the response has been amazing and we're very excited to see people follow through with this) and we are hoping to get pictures of as many of the trees as possible after they are planted and we'll add those photos to the box too.

Also, I intend to announce on the blog whenever I find out that someone has planted a tree or has donated money to one of the charities. So, please, PLESE, keep us updated on the tree plantings and the donations you've made so that we can share with everyone the positive things that are coming out of this experience. It means the world to Chad and I, but also all of you family and frineds that are grieving with us. It helps Chad and I more than people can ever magine.

Thanks to everyone for all your love and support.

Getting out of the house - letting the world back in.

Okay, so I'll be the first to admit that I have pretty much locked myself in the house for the last week and shut the world completley out in order to cry, and then cry some more, and then cry even more.... I've ignored phone calls, emails, and even visits from friends. Our doorbell suddenly quit working. (Seriously, it just quit, and we've just left it that way.) I took it as a sign from the universe that it was okay for me to be selfish and ignore everything... for a bit. I will not apologize for this because I know you all understand and shutting out the world for a while felt like exactly what I've needed to do. From the time Pax was diagnosed until last week when he passed away life was so chaotic and filled with nothing but talking to doctors, talking to family, talking to friends, talking to each other, repeat... repeat... repeat... It felt like life was non stop talking with no answers whatsoever and no comfort to be found. But now we have comfort knowing that Pax will suffer no more and he's in a much better place. And while this is still an incredibly, incredibly hard time, I'm working on letting the world back in... slowly.

I have returned to work and everyone has been so amazing and supportive. I am lucky to work with so many people that are more like family than co-workers. They've made it as easy a transition for me and as welcoming as they possibly can. (Thank you guys!)

One of the most enjoyable outing we've had was a walk to the park with Nali. Chad and I walked down to Vetrans Memorial Park with her on a HOT afternoon so that we could 'play' with her in the water. Why did I put apostrophes around the word play? Well, many of you know that Nali is the weirdest lab in the world and she doesn't fetch, or particularly like water, among other quirks. So, by 'play' I mean that we spent time trying to coax her into the water and convince her that she's having a good time (instead she just acts like we're torchering her). In the end, Chad just kept throwing her in the river in an attempt to try to get her to see that it's not all that bad. Check out the photos. They're pretty cute if you ask us. (Nali might consider them as concrete physical evidence of torture though)

Chad, trying to coax her in.

Chad, 'convincing' her to get in.

Look at Chad's grin!

This is Nali's 'stop torturing me' face.

Then when it's all said and done, we bribe her with treats so she won't report us to the dog police for the torture we put her through.

In addition to this wonderful outing, we actually went out downtown last night for a concert. I admit that I was incredibly, INCREDIBLY aprehensive about going out in public. As you all can imagine, I never know from moment to moment how my emotions are going to be and how I'm going to handle the sadness when it hits me.

Chad's mom had gotten us the tickets to this concert (Ani Difranco) weeks ago, but in the midst of all the chaos in the last month and a half, we'd completely forgot about the concert. She contacted us a couple days ago to remind us and ask us if we were still interested in going. I was scared and reluctant to go. But after Chad and I talked we decided it would be good for me to get out and see some friends. We agreed that if at any time I broke down or was feeling overwhelmed I would simply leave.

The night was wonderful and I think it was exactly the 'easing back into something social' that I needed. Chad had to work until right before the concert started, so I met up with our wonderful friends Monica and Tanya for dinner at one of my favorite restraunts before the concert. The restraunt is called Bar Gernika and I got to enjoy one of my all time favorite foods - croquetas (aka 'little Basque balls of fried heaven'). I haven't enjoyed them in almost 6 months because they're not exactly considered healthy food to eat while you're pregnant. We then headed over to the concert house where I met up with Sara and Dallas. We had to separate from our friends at the door because Nancy had gotten us VIP tickets to the show and we were let in early at a seprate entrance. (Thanks Nancy!) This was wonderful because this allowed us to find a table and chairs on the first floor with a perfect view of the stage. Chad made it to the concert right before Ani started to play (to my complete relief because yes, I was increasingly apprehensive and anxious without him there in a huge crowd of people - just ask Sara).

Ani put on an absolutely amazing show and it was nice to see her play again as she's one of our all-time favorite artists. It was also a wonderful evening because we ran into a lot of great people at the show, some of whom we haven't seen in 7 years! and some who just moved back to Boise. It was a great evening and it made me smile many times which is a nice feeling for a change.

So, overall, I just wanted to let everyone know that while this is an incredibly hard time, we are doing okay. How could we not be with all the love and support everyone has shown us?

Also, I will try to post pictures of the Alaska trip that we took a couple weeks ago that got ignored on the blog. Hopefully I can do that this weekend or early next week.